fingers tapping on the keyboard. heart of stone. and i don’t need your help. i’m doing just fucking fine on my own.
and aren’t you such a cliché? such a cute little girl? and oh, just let it go. tear your heart out of your chest with your bare hands, and watch as it melts blood-red into the snow.
and the walls press in on me, and my butterfly pulse continues weakly, and suddenly i am a bomb about to explode.
and my eyes are missing puzzle pieces. and my lungs are broken glass. and i just need to let it go. just need to swallow it down with a spoonful of sugar, and let the medicine go down like it’s supposed to.
and riddle me this. and riddle me that. because i don’t know what i want when i’m near you.
because you tell me who i am, and suddenly i’m a ripped wool sweater, unravelling on the floor before you.
and i didn’t think i was this pathetic. but apparently… i don’t know shit.
I don’t really know where this piece came from–there’s no specific inspiration. I’ve had my fair share of at best questionable and at worst toxic relationships (not of the romantic kind, just, you know, relationships in general) though, and I think really how those made me feel–all those combined bad memories just sort of combined to form this poem, I don’t know. Being stuck inside the house has really left me a lot of time to ruminate on my memories–time I would rather not have, honestly, but I guess maybe something good will come out of it.